Episode 15

[Yul Kwon]

Congratulations! You've made it to the Final 5!

The time to the final round is getting closer and closer. Size up your competition and tell me how you think they stack up. Who are you looking to get to the end with? Who are you hoping doesn't make it?

[Jeff]

I suddenly feel very vulnerable.

I think they are idiots if they don't take me and/or Tina. The jury clearly loves Chris and Carter, lol. Kimmi's been named a threat all game.

This game is Carter's to lose right now.

[Jeff]

I am now in the very desirable position of deciding who beats me in the end. well done, Jeff. well done.

[Jeff]

Well, at the end of the day, I played exactly how I wanted to play.

I said in my application that I was willing to slit throats and I totally did that. I think you got exactly what you were expecting out of me and maybe more.

I didn't just want to be a tiger who got out of his cage and just mercilessly annihilated people in a scorched earth type of game. I wanted to betray people, to set off a bomb but hang around to contain the blast. I think I was very good at that. It's frustrating to think that I played so well in my own head but come across poorly to the jury. I'm sure everyone says that but I truly believe I played a good game. I guess I'll find out what people actually think when the game's over - just a little frustrated, don't mind me.

[Jeff]

I thought about this quite a lot when I was trying to sleep last night and I came to the conclusion that I think I can still win.

I don't think I can beat Carter, but I think I can beat Chris and Kimmi. I'm not saying I will, just that I can. There is definitely a chance. With Carter, I think he is the jury's sweetheart. As long as Carter is out of the game and as long as I am in the final 3, I believe I have a fighter's chance. I think that having conviction about my game and believing in myself and my game is the best course of action - to the jury, that is, not to the other people in the game.

I'm going to continue to say to everyone in the game that it's Carter >> Chris > Kimmi > me > Tina when really I think it is Carter >>>>>>>>> Chris => me => Kimmi >>> Tina

I think I've played the best game but I don't think I am as likable to the jury as Carter and possibly not as Chris or Kimmi, we'll see. I'm not counting myself out just yet.

[Jeff]

I'm the only one in this game (not including Zane?) who hasn't yet had a single vote cast against them. I soooo hope I make it to the end without a single vote cast against me, that'd be so cool.

Chris had last night (that totally counts), he'll probably get more if he wins out. Carter, I think got votes in nuMadhesi TC1 if I remember correctly. Kimmi got votes from at least Richard and Tina got the votes merge TC1. And of course everyone who is out of the game got votes as well, including Keith who got PB's vote despite being an inactive boot.

[Jeff]

???

Does Tina have access to my confessionals or something? or is that the hallway to the confessionals?

[Jeff]

I'm totally lost as to why Kimmi is such a big threat.

Everything she could possibly say has to be met with a lot of tandem work with me but I've done it better. Unless I'm completely delusional, I don't see it. If she doesn't mention me in 90% of her pitch in FTC she's lying to them.

Chris was a much bigger threat imo .

[Jeff]

I honestly don't get it.

Either my perspective in this game is completely off or my knowledge of what makes a good Survivor player is completely off. I just don't get it.

[Jeff]

I feel like just going off at Carter about how I am a much bigger threat than Kimmi but I can't do that or he'll want me out of the game.

This is so stupid. I must be delusional.

[Jeff]

This is how I feel right now with people just counting me out of this fucking game.

http://zankiegrance.tumblr.com/post/946 ... ut-frankie

I feel like I'm wasting my fucking time right now.

[Jeff]

I've tried so hard. To lose in the finals especially to get 0 votes would break me, I'd honestly just start crying right then and there.

I tried so hard. and got so far. but in the end it's not even going to fucking matter.

[Jeff]

Carter's right. I think the perception these people have is totally made up. I've pushed and pushed that I'm not a threat so hard that when people start believing it and regurgitating it, I was like HEY you're not supposed to count me out of it completely.

Fuck. this game is doing my head in. I have tried so hard lol ... to have people congratulate one of 2 people left in the game, to have someone tell me to my face that they will not vote for me. fucking ow.

[Jeff]

omg I need to shut up, seriously.

Not only because I probably sound like a dumb whiner but also because I can't do this right now like I could put myself in jeopardy by telling them I'm a bigger threat than Kimmi..

god damn.

[Jeff]

One of my favorite things since the merge has been deleting each person from my friendslist as they got voted out of the game and watching the amount of people left in the game shrink and shrink and shrink.